Thoughts in the Glass of Time



I miss the possibilities,
the open-ended themes
allowed free rein and unfettered interpretation.
I miss the endless seconds
passing through the hourglass of life’s days.
I miss the heat of idealism
and the energy burning
without obvious cause
and to spilled effect.
Mostly, I miss the sense that
more days are ahead of me
than are behind me.

But I do not miss
the uncertainty of self,
nor the pain of new love
tattered by tears in the fabric of lives.
Nor do I miss the innocence
of the first blood of riotous adulthood.
Instead, I look
to the quickening of pulse
in the frost of my autumn,
to the moment of peace within the day
when horizon is lost
within the colors of dusk,
and to when I can hold the hand
of my beloved
into the thickening night,
and feel the pulse of our two bodies
merge in time.

copyright/All rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012 

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Comments

  1. That's really good!

    And thanks so much for participating in last week's Limerick-Off with your fun verse! A new one's begun. I hope to see you back.

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  2. Keep in mind most of the artist's best work is created in the frost of autumn!! And most likely like Monet, O'Keefe et al -- well into winter's firelight too.

    And the best is always yet to come. Always.

    xo

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    1. I am looking forward to autumn and hopefully long into winter! Thank you Jannie!! (Now is a great time!!!)

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  3. Oh and Now is a pretty darn great place to be.

    xo

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  4. Beautiful Audrey, I am approaching the closer side to 50 now and I feel the same way too. I appreciate the same things.

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  5. It's a good thing when we reach that certain age where, (hopefully) by then we know for sure what really mattered most and, what didn't. This speak of life-lessons learned, and acceptance and pleasure of what is. A lovely read.

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  6. Nor do I miss the innocence
    of the first blood of riotous adulthood. -> if this is innocence, where did you end up going?

    verification makes it really hard to comment. you'd get more comments if you turned it off

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    1. Thank you for letting me know--I thought I had turned it off--

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  7. feeling the pulse of our two bodies
    merge in time...that's a great image... yep..getting older def. has its advantages as well...think i wouldn't want to go back either...

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    1. Thank you Claudia--but I must say there are some things to miss--energy--

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  8. Sooooo nice...there is something to be said for leaving behind those days of the search for the self- particularly in loves games. I love the way you spell this out - depart from thito to a more secure place- and I've been there....this poem takes me there...and I love it

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    1. Thank you Stu--I am probably not as much of a codger as I sound--it was a reflective moment--

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  9. really lovely write, Audrey... looking back and forward... but the most beautiful place to be is the present... it really is a gift.

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  10. This takes time and softens the blow! A powerfully tender voice here, a pleasure to immerse myself in this! xoxo

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  11. So beautiful:

    the moment of peace within the day
    when horizon is lost
    within the colors of dusk

    ... I love this part of the day, too.

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  12. Just an EXQUISITE write, Audrey.

    "But I do not miss the uncertainty of self..."

    We used to call it "getting our head together." Like you'd get up in the morning and go sit out on the porch and some other hippie who was crashing at the same pad would come along and say "what ya doin' man?" and you'd say, "GITTIN' MY HEAD TOGETHER, MAN." Which meant you were sitting there wondering what the hell you were doing with your life, or what you could be doing with your life but weren't, and it would all be too overwhelming, so you'd say forget it and just go get high.

    I don't miss that. Well, maybe certain parts of it.

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    1. You crack me up Timo--very much recall the getting my head together days (of course, I was a child then)--there were certainly some wild times--Thank you so much for your comments here--

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  13. Yes, youth is wasted on the young, and I did find myself nodding along all through this line by line--immediate, intense and ultimately softly relaxed in the rightness of one's self that takes too many years to find. Beautiful piece.

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    1. Thank you hedgewitch--it does feel as though youth is wated on the young sometimes---

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  14. I don't miss the uncertainty of self but I miss the energy and wide eyed innocence to all the possibilities. I am older so I can appreciate your words.

    Best time is still now, and enjoying it with the loved one ~

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  15. Beautiful poem, Audrey! I got lost in the beauty of this magnificent write. I'd like to thank you for stopping by my website and leaving your thoughts. Thank you!

    "Instead, I look
    to the quickening of pulse
    in the frost of my autumn,
    to the moment of peace within the day
    when horizon is lost
    within the colors of dusk,
    and to when I can hold the hand
    of my beloved"

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  16. Beautiful, beautiful words! I wish I had a beloved to hold hands with at the end of all that, but I agree with the rest. There are things I miss about being younger, but the wisdom and the peace is wonderful as well. :) Great write.

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  17. Still not there yet, but you make it sound not so bad. There are always things to miss and always things to appreciate not missing.

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  18. smiles...there are def things in my youth i am glad i do not have to face...this really is a very beautiful written piece on aging with a bit of grace and we all have to face it....

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  19. really lovely write and felt sense of an allowance only found in wisdom of the heart. ~ Rose

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    1. Thank you so much for reading and commenting Rose--greatly appreciated!

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  20. these were my fave lines:

    "I miss the heat of idealism
    and the energy burning
    without obvious cause"

    This is really a great piece...enjoyed very much!

    r.m. @ newviewfromhere.wordpress.com

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  21. I too miss that more days are behind me but agree that holding hands and merging bodies is a sweet salve.

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  22. Just lovely. I am a bit more apprehensive about what's next! But this is very well-expressed. K.

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    1. Thank you! We are still launching kids into the world and have a ways to go yet!

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  23. this is such an apt description of aging, the wistfulness, the acceptance, the hope. really wonderful.

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  24. Your description and understanding of the seasons of human life brings both smile and knowing grin. I know the youthful phase and now entering the later phase(s) I think Ilike your version better. :) It is strange how more time in experience changes one's perception of past, present and future. There's depth to how far you see into things, even in the present. Your poem celebrates this growing awareness in wonderful terms.

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  25. This was confidently, spectacularly good! Loved ever detail and morsel of it. Bravo!

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  26. I was just thinking along these lines this morning - you said what I was thinking just perfectly! Very eloquent and very enjoyable.

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  27. What a great exploration of the contrasts between youth and adulthood. It can be easy to look back on those days with nostalgia and forget the hardships of the age. I love the hopefulness of this and the determination to live in the moment, and not be consumed by what's to come.

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    1. Thank you so much for reading and commenting Emma! I am so glad that you enjoyed it!

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  28. Very good piece on the seasons of life. The reflecting back and looking forward, you really did a nice job capturing those elements in pieces of this sort that many consider essential in such poems. Aside from the technical, I just like the way the poem moves and what images, mood is cast as I read it. Very nicely done, thanks.

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  29. Hiya Audrey,
    We seem to be trying to come to grips with the same thoughts this week. Nicely done. And your pictorial creation is outstanding.

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    1. Thank you so much hannah--I can't take credit for the picture---I got it from wikimedia commens

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  30. This stuck a sympathetic chord. It is honest, authentic and expressed without nostalgia or sentimentality. A very accomplished poem.Loved it!

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  31. This is so well observed. I do not miss the uncertainty of self or the pain of new love... Here's to the joy and beauty of the Autumn frost. Beautiful piece.

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  32. As a 50 year old woman, I'm really starting to appreciate aging poems. LOL THe ending is fulfilling. I love this write. Bravo!

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  33. I hear ya! Great write, and I can sooo relate to what you're saying!
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2012/03/20/a-promis-comes/

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  34. The repetition really pulls this piece together. Well done and much enjoyed.

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  35. a balanced and beautiful piece that puts it all into perspective. i loved the ending especially.

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    1. Thank you for the read and comments Joanna--much appreciated! See you around the pub!

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  36. A touch of self reflection... I love it :)

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  37. nice way to write it up. I too am there.
    very well said, very well done.
    I enjoyed this.

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  38. Great reflection. Age makes us wiser :) love this !

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