Saturday, December 22, 2012

A Star For Ben

wikimedia commons

Loss breathes its mist
   On me
Heavy with tears
   Salted in pain’s brine
A taste accilimated

   But not today
Today they lie in bitter harvest
   Upon eyes and ears
Under tongues

Longing to turn back the clock
   To a time before
When Christmas lay around the corner
   And those gifts
 Already wrapped
And hidden
Could be the reality

For you
We bought a star
And placed it just so
Upon the horizon
Of the early night’s sky
So that each evening
You can look upon each other
With light.


For Ben. A group of us collected money to pay for funeral expenses for Ben Wheeler of Newtown. We also bought a star for Ben's parents. I hope that all these families will be able to find peace and light.

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012
Shared with dVerse Poets Poetics: Presents/Presence

Friday, December 21, 2012

Particulate Matter

wikimedia commons
Image réalisée avec le logiciel Chaoscope (freeware);attracteur IFS.

Particulate matter
Of density uncertain
Packs its way
Into others' negative space
Exploding in time
Negating its influence
Pulling at density
Creating its sound
A kind of horrific rush

But present nonetheless
As it moves
Toward wave

I dance upon the string
(all mistakes in science are strictly my own)
I dance.

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

Posted for the Toads Open Link Monday

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

With Gratitude

Ellen Wilson
Poets United

Today, Ellen at  Poets United Wonder Wednesday #14 charges us with posting on our blogs, a poem that we felt was a gift. I am most profoundly grateful today. My daughter was released from the hospital last night and  is doing better. This poem by e.e. cummings was read at my wedding and I thought of it again today.

With gratitude

i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky;and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes
(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday;this is the birth
day of life and love and wings:and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)
how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any-lifted from the no
of all nothing-human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?
(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
~ e.e. cummings ~
(Complete Poems 1904-1962)

I added one more piece by Laura Hegfield, called Is It Stealing. This piece came to me at a time when I needed to see light and she gave it to me. I have posted it here, but her blog is really beautiful, so please check it out.

Is it stealing God is it stealing?
Crouching down then half kneeling,
one worn denim knee nesting on wintering
weeds gone gold in the fleeting sun o’er a farmer’s
fallow field.
Is it stealing?

Hungrily taking photos
attempts my heart knows are folly,
capturing time through a lens,
digital morsels marking the majesty of a single moment,
then another,
and another.
Nourishing my soul as I feast upon Your bounty,

Is it stealing?

Is it blessing?

Pausing to see with ready attention beauty dying
before my eyes as light departs.  
Observing the luminous globe sinking into the horizon,
sky ribboned lavender, heather, cornflower, fading blue
tears wet joy glide down iced cheeks,
feeling full satisfaction simply, (simply?)
witnessing the wonder of it all.

This act of narrowing expansive awareness into
images that if printed will decay
or stored virtually as pixels will likely be
long after the wild grasses have crumbled
the seeds swaddled in soft soil
birthed and re-birthed,
surely more seasons
than I shall live.

Is it blessing God is it blessing?
Crouching down then half kneeling,
one worn denim knee nesting on wintering
weeds gone gold in the fleeting sun o’er a farmer's
fallow field.
Is it blessing?

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Waiting, Day 5

wikimedia commons
Jessie Eastland aka Robert DeMeo, 2012

a haze of dream
   built upon
confederate sky
   a blister of cloud
hanging by

as dream illumines
   a silvered moment
encapsulated entirely
   by sered husk
of ageless smiles
blooming toward dawn

the expanse of sky
holds me riveted
a moment passes too soon

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

Posted for dVerse Open Link Night   Dverse

My daughter has Dengue Fever on a small island in Thailand.  She was hospitalized yesterday. So I wait and pray as I look at the sky

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Dengue and the Wait

i wait to hear
that the critical time has passed
that this disease which ravages you
will not kill you
that you will survive
and organs will not bleed out
will not fail you

and i take comfort in small things
the mist of steam punctuated
with the sweetness of a scent of spiced tea
from your childhood
it’s warmth as i hold a cup in my hands
your humor as we trade emoticons across an ocean

i count on the fact that you are young and strong
and that this fever cannot decimate you
and i watch  the clock as it ticks by
one more day before the critical phase passes

i would bring you home if i could
i would wrap you in my arms
and tell you stories of sunshine and laughter
of how your dog still misses you in the night
i would dream with you

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

My daughter is in Thailand with Dengue Fever right now. Right now, she is in the critical phase of the disease. Dengue is on the rise worldwide and is called the "bone crushing" disease. There is no immunization and no specific treatment for the disease other than liquids.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

A Slate of Blue

wikimedia commons
Benjamin Gimmel
Sonne hinter Pflanze

   slate of blue

a feeding upon
     the fastidiousness

of sky
     a promise held

in abeyance
     as winter blooms

and dreams
     lie buried

along with grubs
     to await the thaw

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Dapple Me Babe

"Kirche Gröben" (big church), Brandenburg, Germany. Light travels through window.
Lienhard Schulz
Wikimedia commons

The sun inched out today after five days of rain
bursting light everywhere
even underneath
and I felt my mood lighten
and joy crept in where tears had furrowed their rows earlier
and love opened its doors wide
and I stepped inside

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

Sunday, December 2, 2012


Object to be Destroyed by Man Ray
from Tess at Magpie Tales

Wagging finger of righteous indignation at incessant failures
Beating time in triumph
Your precision a mark in the annuls of marked seconds
A moment of suspended legato
We begin again.

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

posted for  The Mag #145

Urban Rain

vor der Haustür
Wassertropfen / Regentropfen / Wasser / Natur / Blatt / Tropfen / Makro / Regen
zur freien Verfügung
wikimedia commons

Silent rain
A mist over concrete
Cools the heat of friction
And asphalt releases
Its steam
To be reabsorbed

A cloud
A vapor
A mist
To blur signage

As I look
Face upturned
The silent rain caressing lid and lash
Brushing lip
Reminds me
That I could be anywhere,
A vale
A moor
A valley
Where the kiss of nature’s
Tears meet earth
Renouncing summer’s heat
Quenching thirst
I open my eyes

To the concrete
And feel nature’s cooling
Her language
Even here
She has found her way.

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2012

Posted to Poets United Pantry #126