Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Stuck


The Morguefile



i am not old,
not yet.
cocks crow those announcements
dancing around edges of things unknown to me.

looking down with scarred eyes
as my abacus shifts weight,
i nod my head 
to the rhythm of clacks
moving my days along.


i am not young.
i have lost my appetite for ambition,
that season-all salt
of the palate of my 30's
and 40's too
if I am honest.

ambition is an aphrodisiac 
in that gloaming of sex on boardroom tables
and bathroom stalls 
after too many cosmopolitans.

i got tired of the hangover
and so, took the cure

abstinence is a bitch
cool as ice floes, calving.

copyright/all rights reserved Audrey Howitt 2015 


Not really sure what this is all about. I am feeling kind of stuck between things right now.

Posted for Real Toads

20 comments:

  1. Too real to be weird. Very good.

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    1. I guess you are right--not so weird--but it feels weird in my shoes right now

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  2. Not to old yet to old.. I would stay clear of those boardrooms.

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  3. OH! MY! GOD! Those two closing lines are just brilliant! Take it from me, kiddo, you are far from old...long way to go yet!

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  4. smiles. it happens...i def dont have the same ambition i had in my younger days...
    i think our priorities change as well..and that can take some getting use to...but we find ourselves
    anew along the way...

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  5. I've just realized that I was probably born old...

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  6. stuck between things
    yet this poem is about transition

    thing is we're always on the journey
    and don't arrive until we're in the coffin

    namaste
    jzb

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  7. What an awesome stream of consciousness write about coming to terms with and putting to rest, aspirations – we once considered to be fixed - as we move through the chapters and passages of our lives. . . evolving as we go.

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  8. Nice write, Audrey. Do like I do, abstain from just some parts, perhaps those giving the worst hangovers. Hangover from sex? Never, it's a keeper.
    ..

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    1. Forgot to tell you, this reminds me of the Bob Dylan's song, Stuck in the Middle with You
      "Clowns to left of me, jokers to the right,
      Here I am, stuck in the middle with you"
      ..

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  9. I think being old is a state of mind. Some people were born old. Some never grow up.

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  10. I was humming the old song by Steeler's Wheel...."Stuck in the Middle".....oh well, you may not know what it was about but I enjoyed it.

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  11. Deep thoughts indeed, Audrey.
    On a side note...hope you doing fine.
    xoxo

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  12. The hesitation to leave careless youth and goal oriented middle age behind is classic - but once one has, I bet life is far more pleasant. Nice write!

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  13. Ha. Super clever. Succinct and biting. K. Manicddaily

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  14. i am not old,
    not yet.
    cocks crow those announcements

    i am not young.
    i have lost my appetite for ambition

    How I could relate to your poem. Strong write.

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  15. Stuck...I find myself there. Such a wonderfully creative write

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  16. Wow, I just love this! Lost my appetite for ambition... got tired of the hangover... the cure. Those last two lines are fantastic. They seem to open up to something entirely to come, different. Chapter two of this, more metaphoric, maybe. Love it. For being stuck, you've produced something really profound here. Thank you!

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I appreciate your comments and thoughts--thank you for stopping by! I don't always reply here, but always try to reciprocate--so hang in there, I will be over to your blog in a jiffy!